Friday, March 30, 2012


           "Within your heart, keep one still, secret spot where dreams may go"
What is a dream?  It is something hoped for.  It is the thing you long for.  It also is something you have probably been doing for a long time and you’re probably already gifted in.

I have been dreaming of my future and some of the things I want to do before the nest is empty.  Some people, parents especially, wait until the nest is empty before they figure out what they want to do next.  I say start where you’re planted.  Start now.  Today is the day of new beginnings, for planning your future.  I am working toward my dream of being a published author.  You must act on the dreams you want to see fulfilled. 

For example, I long to be a writer-so I write.  Yet, at times, I want to be at a higher level than where I am today.  However, I know it's going to take time to get there. In the meantime- I need to polish my craft.  How, you may ask?  I have to keep writing and writing and writing.  I also need to continue attending seminars at places such as the writers’ workshop and the local community college in my area.  In order to gain the knowledge and experience from those who have gone before me. 

I have a little plaque that says, “Within your heart, keep one still, secret spot where dreams may go."  I’ve had that little plaque for years and I love that saying. Those words have inspired and challenged me in so many ways throughout my life and it still does. 

Don't stop dreaming.  Your dreams can be a place, an adventure, a project, a new life, a new home, etc.  Keep dreaming; keep believing, be ever-hopeful; even when it looks like you're circumstances will never change.  Everything is subject to change!

The key is to take the necessary steps to get to the next level.  Want a home?  Save for it.  Want to be an actor?  Then act!  Take classes and learn the craft.  Do something.  Every step you make toward your goal is one step closer to fulfilling the dreams that only you can achieve.

I am sure many of you have dreams you thought were too late to speak of;  it’s never too late.  I know a woman who at the age of 70, went back to college and pursued a law degree, she now works in the town she lives in fulfilling her dream. 

Don’t just dream a dream, live it!


Tuesday, March 13, 2012

After you say, 'I do'

Becoming a wife is not just about saying ‘I do’.  It’s much more than that. 

There are elementary things that every wife should know in order to run her household well. She must train her children (both male and female) on how to do things for themselves, so whether they are off to college or getting married they can learn to take care of themselves. I am fortunate that my husband is not only handy outside the home, he also knows how to cook, clean, do the laundry and much more.

A wife must know how to cook, clean, take care of the home, raise her children (should you desire to have children, read on…)

Regarding children:  A wife must...

• teach them proper manners (before company comes over)
• teach them discipline
• teach them to honor mother and father
• teach them to respect each other, to respect their elders
• teach them proper hygiene (girls and boys)
• teach them how to cook (I learned to cook at 10 years of age)
• make sure your children dress properly especially when you have guests
• ensure they have annual check-ups: eyes, teeth and overall health
• teach them to say please and thank you; when a gift is given send a thank you note immediately
• be responsible for their spiritual training

Remember that each child is different; work according to knowledge with each of them.

Regarding your husband: A wife must...

• cook for him (feed him)
• meet his needs (intimacy-this goes both ways)
• spend time talking and listening to each other
• remind each other that you love each other
• honor and respect each others differences
• forgive often
• laugh often
• play often
• pray together (as a family)
• always remember that trust and security are keys to a happy marriage

Remember that the home is the first place for training, church, and schools are secondary.

A wife should know how to sew (mend socks, sew buttons, repairs, crafting items-it helps when the kids have a craft project for school).  A wife needs to know how to do laundry: sorting, washing, ironing or steaming them.  You should know how to prepare your family for the change of seasons. Have the proper clothing for each season: winter clothes for fall/winter weather, spring and summer for that change of season as well.

A wife needs to also be a nurse to her family. When one of the children or your spouse is ill, you must attend to them.   You should know how to check a person’s temperature and what to feed them during that period of time, (if you are not sure ask your physician).

My mom had nine children. I was the fourth oldest, so there were five younger siblings after me.  I learned how to care for my younger siblings. I was taught at an early age to cook for 12-20 people.  There were 11 of us in our home and mom always had a few extra people at the dinner table.   I was taught to dust and polish the furniture, clean and scrub the floors by getting on your hands and knees, wash clothes, iron, etc.  I learned how to serve guests - mom was always entertaining friends and family.  I learned a great many things from my mother.

Remember that as a wife and mother you must learn to care for your family, not just the children, but also you must take care in meeting your husband’s needs as well; not as the last thing to do, but the first thing you do.

Remember you are not only a wife, but you are also a mother, sister, aunt, friend and you are a woman who has needs of her own. So carve out some me-time for yourself.  Take a walk, go to the gym, plant some flowers, blog, teach, read, keep learning new things…you know what to do! 

Be sure that in the midst of your busy-ness that you take care of yourself. Your family is counting on you.

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Oh, to forgive...

Today I want to talk about forgiveness especially on the home-front.  Your home is a place of rest, a  place of refuge, your sanctuary.  The home is where lives are built, encouraged, and loved and when we make mistakes, we get second chances (and third, fourth and fifth, chances) to get it right!  

It is the place whereby character is built. The home is where integrity is taught and forgiveness is displayed. 

Your role as a mother training her child is critical.  Think about how many times you have to repeat yourself to your children when they are young; you want to lose your patience!  

Forgiveness is so critical because it shows what our characters are made of.  When we say to our spouse or our children, I’m sorry, please forgive me; we are showing and teaching them that we too are human.  It helps to build trust as well.  More importantly we are teaching our children principles for living that will carry them for rest of their life.  

How many people can you think of that are still not speaking to each other because they failed to forgive?

When we choose to forgive, we release that person, we release that offense.  The scriptures clearly states that you need to forgive so that nothing will hinder your prayers. (1Peter 3:7 and Mark 11:25)   

You make the choice to forgive that person, whether that person is alive or not. Forgiveness is an act of your will; to pardon someone for a mistake or offense that was made. 

Forgive often.